Debunking Humor...

"One side will make you bigger, and one side will make you smaller".
I think I might just stick to the ones that mother gives me...

But as Grace Slick sang,
External Quote:

And the ones that mother gives you
Don't do anything at all
Go ask Alice
When she's ten feet tall
Um. -Thinking about it, you're probably very sensible @JMartJr, you don't need to be high as a kite to have fun.


Capture.JPG



(Oops- Just remembered most of you guys probably pronounce it "fun jai"; but to me and some others here it's "fun guy").
 
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@JMartJr, you don't need to be high as a kite to have fun.


Bigfoot is Santa
"...the enigmatic heraldic symbol of Lapland, the wildman — a hairy, reddish, bestial character dressed in leaves, wielding a gnarled club. To me he looked like a typical prehistoric caveman or the Jolly Green Giant. I collected vague reports of an actual Swedish wildman (Snömannen), a yeti-like creature believed to inhabit the remote areas of the forest. One day when wandering through the wilds of Lapland, I beheld an astonishing thing: a colossal statue of the wildman painted bright red with a snowy white beard. From a distance it looked like Santa Claus. As I stood at the base, staring up at the Herculean statue, it hit me like a hunk of red-hot ejecta from Mount Hekla: Santa Claus, the wildman and Snömannen must spring from the same ancient source. I determined to find the connections between these enigmatic characters.

THE WILDMAN OF THE MIDDLE AGES WAS described as a grotesque, bestial, ape-like creature, dark, filthy and bearded. Its body was covered in thick, matted hair and gave off a foul odor. (In later depictions of the wildman, his fur was often replaced by leaves.) Sometimes horned, with a prominent sex organ or wielding a club, he was considered frenzied and insane, and was the personification of lust and debauchery. He was known to mate with humans. The habitat of the wildman was the northern woods where he lived in a cave or den. His traditional beast of burden was the reindeer. The wildman shares all these traits with the yeti as well as the devil. (Satan would often appear to Martin Luther as an ape-like entity with filthy, matted hair exuding a heinous odor.) In the 17th century, Pope Gregory I set the specifications of Satan, describing him as dark in color, with horns, hooves and a terrible stench. The devil is also known as Nikolas, or Old Nick for short, while nickel is a term for a demon. In various regions, the wildman is known as Chläus, Div, Djadek, Jass, Kinderfresser (child eater), Klapperbok, Old Scratch, Thomasniklo and Schrat. Over the ages, the brutal wildman figure evolved into a character more like a clown or holiday fool. How the Grinch Stole Christmas by Dr. Seuss follows a classic wildman scenario: The Grinch is a hairy, Bigfoot-like creature that lives in an alpine cave in a mountain similar to the Matterhorn.

...The Snömannen is described as a dark, ape-like creature covered in thick, dirty, stinky hair — more like the abominable snowman. His face is broad with prominent brow ridges, nose pressed flat, and a mouth that juts out from a huge jaw. His arms are larger than a man's, and his feet are enormous, with hairless soles. In mountainous regions, the Snömannen's coat turns silver or snow-white in winter. Snömannen's favorite food is cranberries.

...AT FIRST I WAS PUZZLED BY THE LINE in Clement Moore's poem concerning the miniature sleigh and tiny reindeer. Then, as I was researching the Saami shaman drum, it became crystal clear. The shaman beats his drum until he reaches the specific rhythm and tone that sends him into a trancelike state of ecstasy. In this altered state called gievvot, his soul travels to the spirit world to converse with the dead. But first, the drum must be granted "life" by means of a particular ritual, and possessed by a guardian spirit — most commonly a reindeer. The shaman, with the help of his reindeer guide (or basseváresarves), can take his spiritual journey. On the drum skin are painted (in alder bark mixed with spit) various blood-red symbols that help guide the shaman on his "reindeer vision" across the cosmic road (the Milky Way) to Jábmeájmoo, the Land of the Dead.

One symbol is a miniature sleigh pulled by a tiny reindeer. This image is used by the shaman to "ride into the sky," calling to mind Santa's Christmas Eve flight. On the other hand, Siberian shamans feed psychedelic mushrooms (Amanita muscaria) to their reindeer. The animals' metabolism removes the toxins from the mushrooms but leaves the hallucinogenic properties intact in the urine. The shamans then drink the reindeer pee to "fly high." In the American drug subculture, the slang term "sleigh riding" refers to a drugged-out state, while "reindeer dust" is another word for cocaine.
https://www.laweekly.com/santa-is-a-wildman/


eb808e23f079ff5f4879f1a95aab4871.jpg
 
From the thread, Claim: Original Calvine UFO Photo,
discussing the claimed "disappearance" of the (claimed) two young men who (it is claimed) witnessed/ photographed a UFO,

If I recall correctly they were said to have worked at a hotel in Pitlochry, not at "the Pitlochry hotel". Plus they were a couple of English lads, only up in Scotland to work the summer season.

Maybe, with a new confidence in their ability to photograph rare things, they moved on to a certain Scottish lake in search of fame and fortune, but were promptly eaten by plesiosaurs?
 
Surely Bishop Len Brennan? He heard a false narrative, but allowed himself to be guided by the evidence...
But Ted attempted to actively debunk the... you know, come to think of it, I am not sure if we were ever clearly told whether Dougal believed that distant full-sized cows were small and nearby, or that toy cows were full sized and in the distance. The former seems more likely, but we ARE talking about young Dougal here...
 
Happy New Year to all Metabunkers! I hope you all have an enjoyable and productive 2025.

I've made some predictions for the year ahead:

February

Wildcat strikes by air traffic controllers halt flights on the US Eastern seaboard.
In other news, the New Jersey drone sightings end.

April
A TV interview with the Polaris Dawn astronauts, "the first civilian crew in space", collapses into disorder as the studio is breached by Russian tortoises bearing placards claiming their ancestors flew around the moon 56 years before.

June
Xi Jinping restates his priority of unifying China and Taiwan under one government.
In an unexpected twist, he disbands the Communist Party and hands all power to the authorities in Taipei.
Later in the year he appears as the title character in a Broadway production of Winnie the Pooh and the Blustery Day, to almost universal acclaim.

July
While he's out for a picnic, Luis Elizondo's dashcam captures a shiny ovoid landing in a clearing 50 yards away.
Three three-and-a-half foot tall figures in what appear to be spacesuits get out and dig up some soil which they put into containers; one appears to find a dead rabbit which he picks up- the others gather around, nodding their heads and apparently waving their arms in excitement, before they re-embark and the craft ascends silently. Elizondo and two friends also capture the scene on their phones from different vantage points; they take great care to note the precise time and location, which is all independently confirmed later.

"We shouldn't make too much of this", says Mr Elizondo. "It might well have been a special balloon gondola with diffuse LED lighting. Modern materials might mean that the suspension cables are narrow and hard to see. We didn't notice any mist, but it's possible that the balloon was hidden and we were distracted by the gondola. They were probably environmentalists who didn't want to disturb or contaminate the site too much. I applaud the greater inclusivity of modern academia, including of course little people. It was an interesting scene, but we shouldn't bring our preconceptions to what might seem to be an unusual event. I mean, it's not worth a chapter in a book, is it?"

August
The diplomatic spat over President Trump's offer to buy Greenland takes an unexpected turn, as Danish troops sail up the Potomac and rampage through the Whitehouse.

American anger is assuaged when returning US authorities find the Whitehouse is now more environmentally friendly,
and a cosier, more collaborative place to work in, with an excellent creche, bicycle racks and superior beers in the fridges.

September
Music industry executives investigate an unexpected increase in middle-aged men streaming music videos by Sabrina Carpenter, Dua Lipa and Charli XCX; all is explained when it's realised they've found the "mute" icon.

October
To no-one's surprise, it is announced Vladimir Putin will be the villain in the next James Bond film.
However, there is a backlash from Bond fans when it is leaked that Alex Baldwin will play the fictional spy.
In an unprecedented intervention, an MI6 spokeswoman states that Baldwin is the right man for the job.

November
The World pauses in shared wonder as the newly-commissioned Now This Is A Really Big Telescope detects oxygen, methane, and traces of chlorophyll and complex proteins in an exoplanet's atmosphere.

And everywhere else it looks.

An optics installer is fired when he admits eating an egg and cress sandwich in the clean room during final assembly.

December
There is scandal in Smalltown, when officials find a group of immigrants "of middle-eastern appearance" sheltering in a farm outbuilding.
"A mother with a newborn baby was accompanied by her partner, but there seemed to be some issue about paternity," said the local pastor; "We're a Christian community, we don't hold with that sort of thing here." Three men were questioned for possession of bullion, a "herbal substance" and an unlicensed ointment, none of which appeared to have been declared at Customs.
"They don't seem to be dangerous, but we're having trouble making sense of their stories," said the local police chief.
"I'm just glad we put a stop to this strange behavior, whatever it was in aid of, so our community can celebrate Christmas in peace. And we will do, as soon as we get rid of that bright shiny drone-thing that keeps flying above the town."
 
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Everyone who read about the "possession of bullion" above and wondered why they brought soup must fess up.

(Raises hand sheepishly...)
 
June
Xi Jinping restates his priority of unifying China and Taiwan under one government.
In an unexpected twist, he disbands the Communist Party and hands all power to the authorities in Taipei.
Later in the year he appears as the title character in a Broadway production of Winnie the Pooh and the Blustery Day, to almost universal acclaim.
Will Barack Obama appear in this production as Tigger?
TIGGER_2590531b.jpg
 
August
The diplomatic spat over President Trump's offer to buy Greenland takes an unexpected turn, as Danish troops sail up the Potomac and rampage through the Whitehouse.

American anger is assuaged when returning US authorities find the Whitehouse is now more environmentally friendly,
and a cosier, more collaborative place to work in, with an excellent creche, bicycle racks and superior beers in the fridges.
Further American-Danish negotiations stall after it is revealed that the US Special Envoy has been engaged in free and frank discussions with a multilayered, laminated sweet pastry in the viennoiserie tradition featuring puff pastry and some sort of reddish fruit jelly...
 
Later in the year he appears as the title character in a Broadway production of Winnie the Pooh and the Blustery Day, to almost universal acclaim.
Clarify, please. Is Xi Jinping playing Winnie the Pooh, or is he appearing as the Blustery Day?
 
Everyone who read about the "possession of bullion" above and wondered why they brought soup must fess up.

Many years ago I read an account (no idea if it was true) about a group of English-speaking mercenaries who foolishly plied their trade in some conflict in Africa.
Having discovered that their opposition didn't run away as soon as a handful of (extraordinarily stupid) white men fired a few rounds, and fearing the consequences of capture, they resorted to the sachets of powder that they'd found in the (Belgian?) ration packs they'd been supplied with, marked
"Poisson Instante", manfully sluicing down the foul-tasting contents, amidst much coughing, with gulps from their water bottles.

And then, as the enemy closed in, nothing. No, not Thanatos' promise of sure sleep- just nothing happened.
The sachets marked "Poisson Instante" contained powdered fish soup, not "instant poison" as the anglophone adventurers believed.
 
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I realize this is counter to the whole point of this place, but dammit if that AIN'T true, it oughtta be!

Agreed.
Anyway, all this talk of fish soup has made me hungry.
A French scientist friend left a container of some Extrait mortel de poisson-globe in the fridge; a fish soup recommended by the world's motels isn't to be sniffed at. She won't mind me taking a few teaspoons.
Speak to you all tomorrow.
 
Happy New Year to all Metabunkers! I hope you all have an enjoyable and productive 2025.

I've made some predictions for the year ahead:

February

Wildcat strikes by air traffic controllers halt flights on the US Eastern seaboard.
In other news, the New Jersey drone sightings end.

April
A TV interview with the Polaris Dawn astronauts, "the first civilian crew in space", collapses into disorder as the studio is breached by Russian tortoises bearing placards claiming their ancestors flew around the moon 56 years before.

June
Xi Jinping restates his priority of unifying China and Taiwan under one government.
In an unexpected twist, he disbands the Communist Party and hands all power to the authorities in Taipei.
Later in the year he appears as the title character in a Broadway production of Winnie the Pooh and the Blustery Day, to almost universal acclaim.

July
While he's out for a picnic, Luis Elizondo's dashcam captures a shiny ovoid landing in a clearing 50 yards away.
Three three-and-a-half foot tall figures in what appear to be spacesuits get out and dig up some soil which they put into containers; one appears to find a dead rabbit which he picks up- the others gather around, nodding their heads and apparently waving their arms in excitement, before they re-embark and the craft ascends silently. Elizondo and two friends also capture the scene on their phones from different vantage points; they take great care to note the precise time and location, which is all independently confirmed later.

"We shouldn't make too much of this", says Mr Elizondo. "It might well have been a special balloon gondola with diffuse LED lighting. Modern materials might mean that the suspension cables are narrow and hard to see. We didn't notice any mist, but it's possible that the balloon was hidden and we were distracted by the gondola. They were probably environmentalists who didn't want to disturb or contaminate the site too much. I applaud the greater inclusivity of modern academia, including of course little people. It was an interesting scene, but we shouldn't bring our preconceptions to what might seem to be an unusual event. I mean, it's not worth a chapter in a book, is it?"

August
The diplomatic spat over President Trump's offer to buy Greenland takes an unexpected turn, as Danish troops sail up the Potomac and rampage through the Whitehouse.

American anger is assuaged when returning US authorities find the Whitehouse is now more environmentally friendly,
and a cosier, more collaborative place to work in, with an excellent creche, bicycle racks and superior beers in the fridges.

September
Music industry executives investigate an unexpected increase in middle-aged men streaming music videos by Sabrina Carpenter, Dua Lipa and Charli XCX; all is explained when it's realised they've found the "mute" icon.

October
To no-one's surprise, it is announced Vladimir Putin will be the villain in the next James Bond film.
However, there is a backlash from Bond fans when it is leaked that Alex Baldwin will play the fictional spy.
In an unprecedented intervention, an MI6 spokeswoman states that Baldwin is the right man for the job.

November
The World pauses in shared wonder as the newly-commissioned Now This Is A Really Big Telescope detects oxygen, methane, and traces of chlorophyll and complex proteins in an exoplanet's atmosphere.

And everywhere else it looks.

An optics installer is fired when he admits eating an egg and cress sandwich in the clean room during final assembly.

December
There is scandal in Smalltown, when officials find a group of immigrants "of middle-eastern appearance" sheltering in a farm outbuilding.
"A mother with a newborn baby was accompanied by her partner, but there seemed to be some issue about paternity," said the local pastor; "We're a Christian community, we don't hold with that sort of thing here." Three men were questioned for possession of bullion, a "herbal substance" and an unlicensed ointment, none of which appeared to have been declared at Customs.
"They don't seem to be dangerous, but we're having trouble making sense of their stories," said the local police chief.
"I'm just glad we put a stop to this strange behavior, whatever it was in aid of, so our community can celebrate Christmas in peace. And we will do, as soon as we get rid of that bright shiny drone-thing that keeps flying above the town."
I hear there are big things coming in 2025.
 
However, there is a backlash from Bond fans when it is leaked that Alex Baldwin will play the fictional spy.
He'd be an unusual choice for sure.
Article:
Talon

The younger brother of performer/director T.T. Boy, Talon went into the family business in 1990, doing gay and bi scenes for Catalina Video under the name Lex Baldwin and appearing on the cover and centerfold of Playgirl magazine. He won Fresh Surprise of the Year at the 1991 Grabby awards and Hottest Bottom at the 1995 Men in Video (Probie) awards. After a break, he resurfaced in 2002 as Talon and has performed in some 1,500 productions, for companies as varied as Adam & Eve, Jules Jordan Video, Red Light District and VCA. He is best known for the quiet intensity he brings to his scenes.
 
He'd be an unusual choice for sure.
Article:
Talon

The younger brother of performer/director T.T. Boy, Talon went into the family business in 1990, doing gay and bi scenes for Catalina Video under the name Lex Baldwin and appearing on the cover and centerfold of Playgirl magazine. He won Fresh Surprise of the Year at the 1991 Grabby awards and Hottest Bottom at the 1995 Men in Video (Probie) awards. After a break, he resurfaced in 2002 as Talon and has performed in some 1,500 productions, for companies as varied as Adam & Eve, Jules Jordan Video, Red Light District and VCA. He is best known for the quiet intensity he brings to his scenes.

Wow, that's going to be some browser history you've got logged - of course, for purely professional and objective reasons!
 
[* is that common enough to be a trope?]
Yeah -- and that video could only have been improved if he had been just behind some rocks, or perhaps been playfully bounding into thick fog or out-of-focus areas...
 
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if I've come across as a smart alec, I apologize.
Have a Guinness on my behalf.

(Groan!) Took me a while to get it, too......

...and even after I got the first line, I was about to google "Alec Baldwin Guinness", wondering if he'd done some promo that I'd missed...
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I meant Alec Baldwin in posts #3255 and #3271 (I've edited the latter).
I bet I've been calling "Alex" since The Hunt For Red Ox Toby.
 
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There was a documentary in the 80's by John C. Arpenter about the dangers of Fog.
TheFog.1980TheatricalPoster.jpg

Source: https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/a/aa/TheFog.1980TheatricalPoster.jpg

And let us not forget that Fog and Mist are commonly confused with each other
External Quote:
Mist is commonly confused with fog
Source: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mist

And we all know of course, that Mist, is full of Gorillas.
Gorillas_in_the_Mist_%28book%29.png

Source: https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/6/60/Gorillas_in_the_Mist_%28book%29.png

Should we be worried about Gorillas in the Mist? Well you'll just have to read the book to find out. ;)
 
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That was a great documentary from John Carpenter. The deep state needs to pay for what it did to Antonio Bay.
 
And we all know of course, that Mist, is full of Gorillas.
Don't be silly- there aren't wild gorillas in North America.

Edited to add: Apologies @Ingrid Delaney, I had overlooked clear photographic evidence:
Capture.JPG


But you may have inadvertently revealed where Bigfoot has been hiding...

American friends, should you have to venture forth into the fog, I hope you've got some stuff left over from Christmas:
Take a small bag of those chocolate coins wrapped in gold and silver foil which small children love so much; revenants of sailors lured to their deaths by your ancestors might mistake these for Spanish Doubloons, Pieces of Eight or whatever.
Don't offer Crypto or card transactions, as refusal often offends.

A large paper bag of leftover carrots and Brussel sprouts, and that candy that you don't like but always receive from a well-meaning auntie, might be enough to placate a Sasquatch.
Always be respectful, they were here before you were.

Stay safe; you're in one of the most secure countries in the world.
Apart from the daemonic sailors, giant wild primates, drones, alien abductors, UFOs dropping molten metal, Orb dog-murderers, Haitian voodoo cat-munchers...
 
Stay safe; you're in one of the most secure countries in the world.
Apart from the daemonic sailors, giant wild primates, drones, alien abductors, UFOs dropping molten metal, Orb dog-murderers, Haitian voodoo cat-munchers...
I just saw a clip on the construction details responsible for the collapse of the Silver Bridge between Ohio and West Virginia more than half a century ago. Again and again, commenters, apparently serious about it, blamed "Mothman" for the disaster. Excuse me while I go tear my hair...
 
I just saw a clip on the construction details responsible for the collapse of the Silver Bridge between Ohio and West Virginia more than half a century ago. Again and again, commenters, apparently serious about it, blamed "Mothman" for the disaster.

Yeah, it's an idea that got a pretty big public boost from a successful movie:

External Quote:

The Mothman Prophecies is a 2002 American supernatural horror-mystery film directed by Mark Pellington, and starring Richard Gere and Laura Linney, with Will Patton, Debra Messing, Alan Bates and Lucinda Jenney in supporting roles. Based on the 1975 book of the same name by parapsychologist and Fortean author John Keel, the screenplay was written by Richard Hatem.

The story follows John Klein (Gere), a reporter who researches the legend of the Mothman. ...

The film claims to be based on actual events that occurred between November 1966 and December 1967 in Point Pleasant, as described by Keel. It was shot in Pittsburgh and Kittanning, Pennsylvania, and was released to mixed reviews, although it was a box office success and has since gained a cult following.[3]
Plot
...
As John reaches the Silver Bridge, malfunctioning traffic lights cause traffic congestion on the bridge. Hearing the bolts and supports of the overloaded bridge straining, John realizes that the prophesied tragedy on the Ohio River was about the bridge, not the power plant. The bridge comes apart, and, as it collapses, Connie's Jeep falls into the water. John jumps in after her and pulls her from the river to safety.
...
The film ends with a claim that the cause of the bridge collapse was never fully determined, and that although Mothman has been sighted in other parts of the world, it was never seen again in Point Pleasant.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Mothman_Prophecies_(film)

This follows the plot of the book, which was also popular -- embedding this stuff in the public consciousness.
 
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