Is there hope for them

[Dad]

I have a 23 year old son who is caught up in this mess of conspiracy theories. He is unemployed and unmotivated to find work. He spends all of his time either smoking pot, listening to AJ, watching Youtube conspiracy theories and posting on Facebook. He has lost all of his friends and has no social life. Arguing or debating the issues is a total waste of time. I have used the material here on this site to try and reason with him but I am sure everyone knows the standard responses I get. It kills me to see my son waste his life.

Are there any success stories out there? Is there any hope for him?

 

[F4Jock]

He could maybe become a Science Fiction writer or another L. Ron Hubbard?

 

[George B]

I have a 23 year old son who is caught up in this mess of conspiracy theories. He is unemployed and unmotivated to find work. He spends all of his time either smoking pot, listening to AJ, watching Youtube conspiracy theories and posting on Facebook. He has lost all of his friends and has no social life. Arguing or debating the issues is a total waste of time. I have used the material here on this site to try and reason with him but I am sure everyone knows the standard responses I get. It kills me to see my son waste his life.

Are there any success stories out there? Is there any hope for him?

Get him a job, a girlfriend, physical activity like hiking, swimming, jogging, etc.. . . quickest way to occupy his mind and time . . .

 

[Jay Reynolds]

Dad,
Please PM me. I may have some ideas for you.
Jay Reynolds

 

[Mick West]

I have a 23 year old son who is caught up in this mess of conspiracy theories. He is unemployed and unmotivated to find work. He spends all of his time either smoking pot, listening to AJ, watching Youtube conspiracy theories and posting on Facebook. He has lost all of his friends and has no social life. Arguing or debating the issues is a total waste of time. I have used the material here on this site to try and reason with him but I am sure everyone knows the standard responses I get. It kills me to see my son waste his life.

Are there any success stories out there? Is there any hope for him?

Yes, there is hope. There are people posting here who used to be like your son to varying degrees, and are now are more interested in honest debunking than in spreading conspiracy theories. There are countless more who simply moved on from the conspiracy culture as they grew up. Just do a search for "former truther"

https://www.google.com/search?q="former+truther"

It's hard to give advice without knowing the person and their full situation. But a few ideas:

People often respond to criticism poorly, so when you argue with him, he's not really arguing based on facts, he's simply arguing back as a reaction to you arguing with him. They can be VERY sensitive to even the faintest suggestion that they might be wrong, immediately throwing up walls. Try to avoid suggesting he is wrong. Avoid judging.

Get him to help you understand his thinking. Tell him you really want to understand what he thinks, and why he things it. This has three benefits:
- you will understand why he thinks as he does, which will help you talk to him
- it will force him to flesh out for himself why he thinks as he does, and he might uncover some inconsistencies by himself
- you asking him for help will put him in a good place mentally.

If possible, try to focus. Try to get into one subject in depth (not breadth), don't move on to a different subject until you really resolve the one question either way, like "why do you think contrails should quickly dissipate".

If you can afford it, pay for him to take an introductory flying lesson - with no expectations, no test afterwards, just something to give his brain some frame of reference.

Separate from the conspiracy stuff, try to encourage (non-judgmentally) any activity that's not conspiracy related, anything that will give him a more balanced perspective on the world.

And remember he's still young. He will get older. He will change.

 

[Dad]

Thanks Mick,
I have had conversations with him on many subjects. It is difficult to stay on one subject because as soon as there is any hint that he might be on shaky ground he changes the subject.

"it will force him to flesh out for himself why he thinks as he does, and he might uncover some inconsistencies by himself" He believes he is among the chosen few who actually understands what is happening in the world. The rest of us are ignorant sheep. The government cannot be trusted and all the media is controlled by the government. Inconsistencies or anything that contradicts his view is either photoshopped or fake.

I believe you correct when you said; "you asking him for help will put him in a good place mentally" I think he enjoys the attention.

Although I am skeptical on how effective "talk" will be I will attempt again to listen. I think the best advice here is to separate him from his fix. I have disconnected his internet, next I plan on shutting down his phone. When he had a job he was less involved in this crap.

 

[Cairenn]

You might also see if you can get him to cut down on his pot usage. There is at least one study, done in rats, where it effects the reaction to perceived threats. It seems to make a user 'over sensitive' to a threat

 

[Pete Tar]

Get this show on DVD or download and watch it with him.
Conspiracy Road Trip.
[video=youtube_share;uVnQPGE36P4]http://youtu.be/uVnQPGE36P4[/video]
I just found out this exists, and haven't seen it, so I don't know how good or bad it is, but the sentiment of actively engaging with people in investigating their beliefs is a good one.

Also Penn and Teller's show Bullshit! is kind of fun, but it does tend to do a hatchet job on people they disagree with and so may not actually be that useful.

 

[George B]

On the lighter side I conducted a Poll which might give some insight on what people think of what is affecting young men specifically. . . http://www.godlikeproductions.com/forum1/message2157549/pg1

Why are there so many "failure-to-Launch Young Men" .. . .? . . .select the most likely reason . ..

[TABLE="class: poll, width: 520"]
[TR]
[TD="class: poll_title, bgcolor: #1E5C99, colspan: 2, align: center"]POLL: Why are there so many "failure-to-Launch Young Men" .. . .? . . .select the most likely reason . ..[/TD]
[/TR]
[TR]
[TD="align: center"]4) The economy stupid[/TD]
[TD="width: 320, align: center"]

15.9% (170)[/TD]
[/TR]
[TR]
[TD="width: 340, align: center"]3) Video games have created a generation of zoned out addicted young men[/TD]
[TD="width: 320, align: center"]

13.5% (144)[/TD]
[/TR]
[TR]
[TD="width: 340, align: center"]5) Lack of reasonable moral or religious upbringing[/TD]
[TD="width: 320, align: center"]

12.8% (137)[/TD]
[/TR]
[TR]
[TD="width: 340, align: center"]8) Everyone has given up. . . The young men just gave up first[/TD]
[TD="width: 320, align: center"]

12.0% (128)[/TD]
[/TR]
[TR]
[TD="width: 340, align: center"]10) Alcohol, Drugs and Pornography[/TD]
[TD="width: 320, align: center"]

10.7% (114)[/TD]
[/TR]
[TR]
[TD="width: 340, align: center"]6) The feminist movement[/TD]
[TD="width: 320, align: center"]

10.1% (108)[/TD]
[/TR]
[TR]
[TD="width: 340, align: center"]12) Public Schools[/TD]
[TD="width: 320, align: center"]

6.9% (74)[/TD]
[/TR]
[TR]
[TD="width: 340, align: center"]9) Women don't respect men anymore[/TD]
[TD="width: 320, align: center"]

5.7% (61)[/TD]
[/TR]
[TR]
[TD="width: 340, align: center"]2) Women have taken over the dominate role and you get what you pay for[/TD]
[TD="width: 320, align: center"]

4.7% (50)[/TD]
[/TR]
[TR]
[TD="width: 340, align: center"]11) TV and Movie image (husbands) of men as losers[/TD]
[TD="width: 320, align: center"]

4.5% (48)[/TD]
[/TR]
[TR]
[TD="width: 340, align: center"]1) Men are cowards and have thrown in the towel[/TD]
[TD="width: 320, align: center"]

2.1% (23)[/TD]
[/TR]
[TR]
[TD="width: 340, align: center"]7) Plot to reduce the birth rate[/TD]
[TD="width: 320, align: center"]

1.2% (13)[/TD]
[/TR]
[TR]
[TD="width: 200, align: center"]Blank (View Results)[/TD]
[TD="width: 320, align: center"](404)[/TD]
[/TR]
[TR]
[TD="colspan: 2, align: center"]Non-Blank Votes: 1070[/TD]
[/TR]
[/TABLE]

Why are there so many "failure-to-Launch Young Men" .. . .? . . .select the most likely reason . ..

"Failure-to-Launch" means young men living in their parent's basement (or something like the basement) instead of living on their own and are not employed or are under employed because of a lack of motivation or fear of failure . . . they may or may not have a girlfriend and have no ambition or desire to get married and start a family of their own . . . etc. . . .

 

[thoughtfuldave]

Former Truther here...a little further along age-wise than your son. I almost destroyed my marriage and am only now getting a hold of my debt. I spent so much money on guns and supplies. My poor wife! Thank God for the information on this site. Keep talking to your son, spend time with him and teach him how to think, and how the CT-ers err in their approach to truth and the world around them.

There is hope...

 

[Mick West]

Former Truther here...a little further along age-wise than your son. I almost destroyed my marriage and am only now getting a hold of my debt. I spent so much money on guns and supplies. My poor wife! Thank God for the information on this site. Keep talking to your son, spend time with him and teach him how to think, and how the CT-ers err in their approach to truth and the world around them.

There is hope...

Dave, I'd be very interested to hear how you became a former truther. Was there a distinct turing point? A series of realisations? Or was it a more gradual thing?

 

[George B]

Dave, I'd be very interested to hear how you became a former truther. Was there a distinct turing point? A series of realisations? Or was it a more gradual thing?

I too would love to hear your story . . .

 

[F4Jock]

Me three!

 

[Cairenn]

Me four. It might be instructive in knowing how to approach them and get them 'unstuck'.